A Glasgow Kiss

So....we lost Glasgow East.
I have to admit I am not surprised.
I knocked on the door of many a Glasgow oik, and I could tell that they were intimidated by my rank and femininity.

I had to keep an inane grin on (see above pic), as these filthy peasants slammed their doors in my face, and wouldn't talk to me unless i got a hairy Scottish oaf (Des Browne see below) to do the talking while the women kept back!


The ignominy! The SNP candidate meanwhile was invited in for cups of sugary tea. I knew then that all was lost.

The reason for this terrible result, as with most things in this country is sexism.
It is not a co-incidence that our recent beleagured candidates, Tamsin Dunwoody, Margaret Curran and even Wendy Alexander have all been women.

The men of Glasgow East, like those in Crewe clearly could not rise above their prejudice to do the right thing and vote for Labour.
Labour has done so much for this impoverished area which is quite similar to my own constituency of Peckham - I'd be just as likely to wear a stab vest around the Glasgow East council estates for instance.

With any luck this by-election result will be the last nail in Gordon's coffin and I can finally take over and become Britain's first female prime minster. I will then be able to implement more aggressive equality bills e.g all-women shortlists whenever there is a vacancy for a FTSE100 chief executive. I can assure you there would be no credit crunch if women had been making the decisions in the banks and companies nationwide.

Peckham Precautions

The Daily Mail bastards have continued today with their hateful campaign against me.

I know this is supposed to be my Happy Blog, but how is Harriet supposed to stay happy when that awful paper insists on writing articles on a daily basis solely to humiliate and ultimately destroy me?

This morning they published my aide's pictures of me in a stab proof jacket during a police walkabout in Peckham yesterday. The pictures were of course meant only for local newspapers to show what a great job I'm doing here, not for outrageous and ludicrous accusations.

The fucking mail article, (written by two men of course) deliberately misquotes me.
"'It is absolutely crucial to have neighbourhood policing which is visible,' she wrote. 'People feel safer when there is a police presents (sic)."
As you can see below, at no point did I say sick on my website. The idiots can't even spell the bloody word, let alone misquote it properly!
Like I told John Humprhys on the Today programme earlier, it was a matter of courtesy and I often wear Indian outfits to make my indian constituents feel more comfortable. It shows just how inferior English culture is that they make women my age cover up their tummies. I wore that stab proof jacket as a matter of courtesy. You have to show respect on the streets of Peckham and that's all I was doing. Humprhys spent the whole interview laughing. What a shit. He's just another evil man who can't handle a successful woman who holds down 5 jobs at a time.

April Fools?

Misogynistic, right-wing, fat, male blogger Guido Fawkes is writing that I will not be facing Theresa May tomorrow but misogynistic (he’s had 2 wives), right-wing fat male Boris Johnson. This doesn’t make any sense, is this an April Fool’s joke? I can’t tell. I’ve already memorized all my lines for Hague tomorrow and if this is true I will have to start all over again. Obviously this shouldn’t be too hard. I have heard that Boris is a clown and a buffoon, so he probably won’t be very good at PMQs and everyone will be laughing at him when

This just goes to show that the testosterone ridden Tory party clearly have no respect for the house of commons and treat the whole thing as a joke. Putting up a Johnson instead of one of my 5 shadows is a slap in the face of parliamentary procedure. They would never dare do this if Gordon was around. This is my chance to shine and I won’t have my PMQs turned into a braying session for a bunch of Hooray Henrys.

Blair Babes vs Sarkozettes

The Daily mail is comparing the women in the French government with those in the British government, especially the volupts. The mail is not focusing on the important work we do, but rather on how old and fat we are compared to them
The mail complains that my accessories are too cheap and my tights are awful. They don't understand that one has to dress like one's constituents. You can't represent Peckham while shoping at Marks and Spencer. I don't know why they keep focusing on me anyway. Lady Hodge, I mean Margaret , is 6 years older than I am, and Tessa Jowell is 3 years older.( Tessa’s backside is also far larger than mine).
The point to make here is that this is what happens when France votes for a sexist pig like Sarkozy instead of a nice female socialist like Segolene.

Sarkozy has chosen not to go for serious women, but has stuffed his cabinet with young exotic things (2 of them are Algerian and 1 of them is Senegalese) . His cabinet is more than 50% women, which sounds good until you find that not one of them is minister of women or minister for children. Clearly he thinks that Justice, human rights are more important portfolios than women and children who make up more than 50% of the population of France.

I also think it is quite shameful that these ethnic women are not taking up positions representing ethnic minorities or equalities. If I, as a white female can be both minister for women and minister for equalities, then surely it wouldn' be too much for them to handle one.

Overpromoted if you ask me.