Showing posts with label Donations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Donations. Show all posts

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Harriet Harman is not a hypocrite!


Some silly people are calling me a hypocrite by criticizing Blair for taking a donation from Richard Desmond and then knowingly taking a donation from David Abrahams.

O shut up will you!

First of all, you cannot even compare the two situations. I wouldn't be caught dead taking money from a man who publishes explicit, disgusting pictures of a woman's Chamber of Venus for consumption by dirty old men.
The fact that Desmond's donation was completely legal while Abrahams was not is completely irrelevant. People really need to get their priorities straight!

The Desmond donation stank to high heaven. Sadly not all women MPs care very much about the publication of these dirty magazines, one of the great moral outrages of our time.

Usual suspect, D-List celeb and nudey actress, Glenda Jackson MP of course had no problem with it, saying:
"Pornography is not illegal. We are perfectly happy to canvas for the votes of people who create a market for those products by buying them," she said. "I don't believe in censorship and I don't see why if someone is very rich they should not be allowed to do more for the political life of their country than vote."

Unsurprising really. Jack and I made the unfortunate mistake of renting a video starring a fellow Labour MP. Needless to say, I was shocked. It's called "Women in Love".
DO NOT WATCH IT.

There is a terrible scene where she is mud-wrestling in the nude with some other woman. They looked like a pair of filthy lesbos. It took ages for poor Jack to get the nasty images out of his mind.

Is it any wonder the woman is a supporter of the P*rn and dirty magazine industry?

No police inquiry for Harriet Harman. HURRAH!

First of all, let me heave a sigh of relief. PPPHHHHHHEEEWW!
My luck seems to be in this month, doesn't it?

The Guardian reports that the Electoral Commission has decided not to refer me to the police.
opting for a slap on my delicate wrists instead. I suppose fair's fair, Ho! Hum!

I've been worried sick about this issue for the last 6 months.
Yes, I know I haven't said much about it, but only because this is my HAPPY blog for HAPPY news. It wouldn't be appropriate to have posts like "My Donations Disgrace" up here!

Sadly, I will have to pay the £5,000 back. I'm not sure if it should go to Janet Kidd or David Abrahams. I'll ask Jack, he is very good at working out these complex issues.

Not sure where the refund money will come from though, I've already re-mortgaged the house and taken a £10,000 overdraft from the bank and thrown a rather unsuccessful fundraiser. My sister Sarah also lent me £18,000 (Yeah, good luck getting that back, sis. You will have to prise the money out of my cold dead fingers!). It's unlikely she'll fork out another 5 grand.

Where does a woman like me get that kind of money from?
I might have to get out my Big Book of Ambiguous EU laws for help.

Any ideas readers? Perhaps I can rustle up a statutory instrument very quickly that could allow MPs to claim double pay overtime for any hours worked past 5pm. It will probably fall somewhere under flexible-working or "work-life balance".

Don't think for one second that it can't be done.
I am the Leader of the House and financial scandal or no, the supreme minister in charge of MPs pay, pensions and expenses, I can make it happen!